Bleach Platinum Hearts RP
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Welcome to The Platinum Hearts Scroller. Here you can find our most recent Of the Year and Of the Season winners. Happy Roleplaying! --- Member of the Year: Locke --- Character of the Year: Alastair Eisfluch --- New Characters of the Year: Mizu Morikawa and Igendai Gyakusuma --- Social Thread of the Year: A Letter for Hymn --- Combat Thread of the Year: Raise Your Spirits --- Member of the Season: Paradigm --- Characters of the Season: Byakuya Kuchiki and Klein Schwarzwotan --- Applications of the Season: Armina Willsaam and Klein Schwarzwotan --- Fight Thread of the Season: Search and Destroy --- Social Thread of the Season: Damage Assessment --- Event Thread of the Season: Midnight Assault
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Blade
Blade
The Hybrid King
Joined : 2011-06-06
Posts : 2651
Age : 26

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Left_bar_bleue10015/100000Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (10015/100000)
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Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty Re: Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2]

Thu Jul 02, 2015 7:13 am
Don't mean to be an asshole Kade, but anything Vampire related needs remove. There are still over 4 dozen instances of Vampire in the application. x-x

-Kake Edit in: Also Kade The Picture of the girl licking the knife is a reserve of Circa Monstrua You also need to fix that too please.~



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Blade
Blade
The Hybrid King
Joined : 2011-06-06
Posts : 2651
Age : 26

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Left_bar_bleue10015/100000Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (10015/100000)
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Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty Re: Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2]

Sat Jul 04, 2015 12:25 am
The Claw Techniques

Alright, first thing first. What does 60% of the attack mean? Energy, force, pain? The way its written also shows that its something thats nearly impossible to "not feel" or "not withstand" in terms of strength of sheer will. That's a no no, try to be more descriptive or specific with the first bit.

True Claw Slash needs to be written to where it states that it doesnt simply damage people or tear their skin. Characters have specific things for defense sometimes, its gotta be fact that it isnt just a 100% attack.

With Crimson Hellfire only one type of weapon can be created at a time, and I want it specified that when she uses these creation abilities that she uses a large amount of energy if used for prolonged periods of time.

Spiritual Flame doesn't need to have a speed boost.

Nova needs to not say its an instant killer. People can survive things like that. Along with that it needs to talk about how it drains her using an attack like that. That's a strong attack, energy is expended.

Woah Woah Woah Woah. She devoured two different races and obtained their powers? No. I don't care who you are, that's absurd. Shinigami refrences in abilities and saying she was devoured needs removed. And with the Davana, is needs remove too or you need to talk to Frost about a way that could give her those abilities as well. It's crazy that she consumed all these powers.

Okay, this is a pet peeve of mine. Dont change it if you dont want to, but Hadouken Kamehameha could use a different name. Seriously.

Remove all instances of "Cant penetrate". Nothing is impossible, describe more in the hell beast area of how he can be beaten or wounded or he cant dodge someone. There aren't any characters on this site that cant be hurt. Whatsoever.

Super Razor Slash cannot be that strong. Simple as that.

Chidori, no. The lightning cannot be a hitter no matter what. Again. Nothing is impossible.

With the Tukara section, remove the fact she can completely nullify Bankai attacks or Ress attacks. That's a no no.

Telepathy needs to state that people can keep from getting controlled. We're iffy on illusions and character controlling powers. That's a no no Kade.

Eternal Partner? Like I said. You gotta remove any instances of consuming other races whole to take their abilities. ALSO. Atma Vatou needs removed. Like I said, no consuming. DE will be discussed once these problems have been altered and fixed.



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Blade
Blade
The Hybrid King
Joined : 2011-06-06
Posts : 2651
Age : 26

Member Info
Platinum Points:
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Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty Re: Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2]

Mon Jul 06, 2015 2:17 am
Alright. First problem is that you need to remove instances of Vampire from the DE Portion.

First thing first, the first portion of her DE powers.

Akasha's Awakening, no. No drawbacks of notable degree. It's a doubling in power basically. Not even Azure or Koichi, those in the 2nd class of DE users below the strongest, can do something like that. It needs reworked or removed entirely.

Breakdown is broken. I don't need any character creating pure Reishi out of the air. Quincy can do it to a degree but its in order to create arrows. The way you do it is absurd. Remove it or rework it to a base level of breakdown. Get these two things fixed and I'll consider whether or not you can be trusted in general with DE.



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Blade
Blade
The Hybrid King
Joined : 2011-06-06
Posts : 2651
Age : 26

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Left_bar_bleue10015/100000Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (10015/100000)
Tiers:

Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty Re: Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2]

Mon Jul 06, 2015 8:56 pm
Application Checklist
  • Name [X]
  • Appropriate Age [X]
  • Gender [X]
  • Appearance Present [X]
  • Appearance Described in Appropriate Length OR Picture is Visible [X]
  • Appearance is Not Claimed [X]
  • 10 sentences for personality [O]
  • History is of appropriate length [X]
  • Powers are not Godmod/Overpowered [X]
  • Powers are described reasonably enough [X]
  • Application/RP Sample is not in First Person [X]
  • Skills are not filled in (Omit if a Hollow)[X]
  • RP Sample Present (Omit if this is not the first character) [X]
  • RP Sample is 10 sentences [X]


Will Skills
  • Willpower/Determination: Adept
  • Mental Deduction: Adept
  • Pain Endurance: Advanced
  • Focus: Adept


Comments/Notes: I spoke of it with Staff, and with my own judgement with grading this app, Im gonna have to deny the use of DE in her. It needs removed before this character can be used. Remove Lust Blood Deception. Forms are locked out. You'll need to roleplay with the character in order to unlock them in the future.
Tier: 2-2



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Blade
Blade
The Hybrid King
Joined : 2011-06-06
Posts : 2651
Age : 26

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Left_bar_bleue10015/100000Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (10015/100000)
Tiers:

Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty Re: Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2]

Mon Jul 06, 2015 11:20 pm
Splitting the DE stuff into archives.



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Blade
Blade
The Hybrid King
Joined : 2011-06-06
Posts : 2651
Age : 26

Member Info
Platinum Points:
Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Left_bar_bleue10015/100000Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty_bar_bleue  (10015/100000)
Tiers:

Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2] Empty Re: Trinity Asthavon [Approved, 2-2/2-2]

Tue Jul 07, 2015 4:47 pm
Removed the word Wrath in Titles. Sorry for the inconvenience



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