Mother...

...But I think that this is the best choice for me.
Mother had just returned from receiving judgement from the doctor about how effective the treatment was. She learned the news after months of grueling pain. After coming home, I begged for her to share the news.

She simply refused to share it.

I have a strong feeling in my gut that she is trying to hold back the painful truth, as I am certain that she fears telling me that the news was bad. I have finally decided that enough is enough, as I can't handle this any longer.

I am officially quitting this site. Why you ask? Not just because of this event, but an accumulation of bullshit over the beginning of all this in February. All of the responsibility I had to assume, all of the places I had to take mother too. The images of sick people in complete agony at the clinics I have been. Seeing my own mother turn bald and groan in pain. It is all too much for me to handle along with the responsibilities on this site. I even have to carry her around when she feels to numb to move. This is just plain pitiful. To think I used to hate my mother for being such a bitch in the past. Now, I am very sorry to see her like this, a broken down mess dealing with Cancer. At first I thought I could handle all this while still working on this site, but now, months into all of this labor and heavy drama, I'm certain that I can no longer handle both at once.

I hope you all understand, for no longer to I feel joy in RPing at all. I feel like I am neglecting my mother, and making it worse for myself whenever I am on here. This all topped off with something Moose told me in Xat

"You notice that being on here is an escape from reality."

I do not wish to escape from reality any longer. Thus, I feel like this is the best choice for me to quit not only this site, but All RP in general. Yes, I know I have planned much for this site, I still have my character that has an entire story waiting to be written. But, real life comes first. Even if I stayed, I would inevitably regret that I didn't focus on my dying mother, and instead a story that can always be continued later on...

I wish to spend every last moment of my mother's life with her, although I am not sure how long she'll last. Whether it will be a few months, or a few years, all I know is that I don't want to lament on the prospect of having spent too little time with her, and shall only return once this all comes to an end, and I feel ready to return. Since I can no longer juggle role playing, this site, and reality, I am only keeping the latter, and discarding the rest.

I know you don't like this, but I dare not turn back on my decision. I will miss you all, as you are all a bunch of swell and fun fellows, just know that I do not regret ever being on this site, for I have had plenty of memorable times on here. Now, however, I simply must move on and assume the great responsibilities forced onto me.

I shall remain on here until the end of today, afterwards, I'm gone for an indefinite period of time. Don't worry, I'll archive my own threads and characters, so you don't have to. I'd rather be the one to bury my own works, for the time being, rather than someone else.

That is all. It was a pleasure to know you all. Good luck without me...

...I see.

Raen, this is a rather brave choice on your end. You're faced with something that is shaking your world - and you had RP, which could've been a way to escape from it, something to hide from the truth that you're facing.

But you're changing that. You're making your own path, showing yourself the reality you need to understand and to comprehend.

Unlike the retirements of a lot of people, this one only gives me more respect for you as a person.

I love ya, bruh.

Live a good life, an'all.

Raen man... I'm sorry to hear about everything that is going on, and I hope everything works itself out in the future.

I think I speak for everyone when I say you were like family, everyone here is. However I respect your decision and I believe you are doing the right thing, making time and spending it with your mother, taking on responsibilities head on now.

Good luck for the future, always see you as one of us and you are welcome back whenever you please.

Hope everything works out well, catcha...

Raen, I know i told you in xat PC, but I think I shall say them again, I know me and you hardly talked with each other, but I never let anyone I know go thou hard times alone. Things are never easy, but as long you know, that we all give you support, thou this time, and wish you well, when I learned the news of your mother, I watched you, you tried your best, you worked hard, and were stronger than anyone else in the same spot.

You did things, wonderful thoughts, and use of words, a great RP member of this site and im sure many others, while yes many of us stay away form walls, but you had your own style and voice all your own in your post. A sense of odd humor, and good taste in music, you know what to do for any post. But life isn't as easy, life is hard, life is cruel, but as I said, know well that we are here for you, come by if you ever need to talk, email us, even call us if you need to.

Now Rean be strong, spend life remembering the good, and not the bad, push forward and know that we are waiting for you.

-Raiki-

Heh, I'll just save any sappy stuff and utter the words that always ring in my head when I think of you.

"Just do it!"

Ya' don't know how many times those words have rang in my head and forced me to do something instead of just talking. You know what you are doing. You are intellgient, you'll be just fine. You are just going on a new adventure too good to be placed in one area forever.

Best wishes ~ The Frost