Lost my smile

At some point on this journey I lost my smile, the joy of writing and good stories, I'm not sure where it went. But everything I do feels forced and like work, I had a conversation with myself today were I thought about just leaving and letting Tsubasa die. I than thought about the work put into him, I don't know what the hell is wrong with me, I feel like I'm hitting a major low point in my life. My parents are nagging me and the stress is finally sinking in, my RP father thinks that I'm finally breaking under the pressure. You see in real life I hold my family on my shoulders, Kakeru can tell you the same for as long as he's known me. I've always worked hard and carried their habit's through injuries and even pain. I'll try to write but it feels like I'm trying to force blood to come out of my body without exit or meaning. I don't know if I'm hitting a depression, or what's wrong. But Frost once gave me advice and I'll take it, I'm gonna meditate tonight and pray try to let out what emotional burden is on my heart, I will update this tomorrow and continue. I am not leaving for certain or doing anything yet, but I'm losing my smile and I don't want to let it go..I want to enjoy this and have fun.

...You know my stance already, so just do what you gotta fuckin' do okay? Don't worry just find yourself again.

Take a break man. Cool your head. Look up ways to relieve stress. Give smiles to people you love or ask any of us here if you need a shoulder or a hug. We're all here for you so that you're able to be here for us, just don't forget that. Just never forget that you're an awesome guy with a ton of great ideas, and nothing is worth you giving that up.

You should take a break off, you need it. Trying to force yourself to roleplay is bad, really bad, and you run the risk of exhausting yourself. It shouldn't ever feel like that, so you should definitely think about resting your muse, and roleplaying muscles. Play some games, watch some movies, read a book. Wait until your life straightens out a bit more. You'll know when to come back when you're ready.

Good luck to you whatever you choose.

I like Kak's advice brotha. Do what you feel is best my friend. You'll be alright

Hey man. You know I'm always open to talking if you just need to vent. Just take some time for yourself. Everybody needs to now and again, right? We're all still very young, and I hope we can keep moving forward with our lives. I wish you would stay, but I wthat wish means with a clear head. So gogo! Just get everything together. Its hard sometimes, you know I have a life similar to your own. So, if you need to talk, I'm here, okay? ^^

So it happened two or three days ago, see I had been in a relationship for a while that's part of why my interests were so hard to pick between..Let's just say things have sort of changed, been meditating and taking Frost's advice and things started to look better. But it happened a couple days ago, my gf of quite a while not gonna give exact dates. She listened to her parents despite me attempting to put more effort into things she wanted..So..despite everything me trying to be better and do better, I still got screwed in the end. Thus is life, I'll be making posts either tonight or tomorrow. This is an update of the situation, I have some muse to work with..just sad right now but like most things in life you get used to it and it shall pass.

Still got your back broseph so don't worry take your time.