I'm Not In The Closet, You're In The Closet [Abalia, Makoto]

Abalia was fairly certain she had not misunderstood what Makoto had said, but she felt, for now at least, that it was better for her to focus on other aspects of Makoto's response. Frankly, any meaning to be gleaned from these final words could be discerned on her own, rather than pressing the poor woman on it.

"The worry that one is a burden is a quite consuming one. But, Makoto, I can only assure you that you are no burden to me. I ensure your well-being, seek your happiness, because I do not wish to see one who matters to me in such a state."

While perhaps normally it might have seemed a poor decision in this situation, Abalia nevertheless moved herself from the opposite side of the table and sat directly next to Makoto, a reassuring gesture. Hopefully, anyway.

"Do not think it is a question of stability being handed to you by someone else. It is brought because you have made these bonds of your own accord. It is, I think, decidedly something which you have earned by allowing yourself to create these emotional connections, even in spite of your misgivings at the very idea."

Even if Makoto chose to simply avoid what she had wished to say, Abalia felt it worthwhile to build off of. Perhaps that was motherly nature, but she could hardly say for certain.

"There are many hypotheticals which might give us pause, which may at times seem to wholly overrule our own views or decisions. But, if there is one thing which I have learned in my life, it is that these hypotheticals are not nearly so important as even a single genuine event."

Abalia knew that perhaps that might have sounded a bit harsher than she intended, but she also felt it was more important to speak honestly than anything else.

"I do not intend to push you in one way or another, or to insist that you do anything in particular. But I do wish to make it clear that I will support you in any way that I am able, and in any way you require."

Ah. That was peculiar. Abalia did, of course, understand what Makoto had meant by that. It was not a romantic admission, it was an affirmation of the bond the two of them shared. To reply in turn was not to make some sort of false promise, so why, then, did Abalia hesitate, even if only for such a minute fraction of an instant that it was all but imperceptible? It was quite simple, really.

No matter how much Abalia might have felt it to be true, her heart was still empty.

Though she returned Makoto's embrace as warmly as she was able, she already understood how she ought to reply, what the correct course of action was. She could do little else but hope that it did not sound as cruel as she thought it might.

"I think you know far better than most that, were I to say those words in kind to you, they would be distressingly empty. They would mean far less than what you deserve."

Despite her own composure, Abalia's hold on Makoto tightened, just the faintest bit. Certainly, she could control those scant few emotions she did feel, but in this situation she had already lowered her guard. She did not wish Makoto to be upset with her.

"Such words are far too important to be said with anything less than the fullness of one's heart, I have found. And I, as I am, do not have a full heart with which to offer them to you. They are a promise which I would not dare make to you in such a state, not when you are so dear to me."

Abalia had, quite honestly, not anticipated that her own words would have been received so warmly. Perhaps she was too critical of her own views, or had simply allowed her judgement to become too clouded by her own lack of emotion. She supposed that was all the more reason for her to be thankful that she had friends who were willing to assist her on that matter.

"Yes, I suppose it will. Thank you for reminding me."

She would not linger on serious topics any longer, if Makoto did not wish to. It was pleasant enough to simply share a meal with her friend, to see her smile and express such earnest cheer. It was something that Abalia could only hope she would find that much more uplifting in time.