Moon on the Water [Asami]

It had been a strange few weeks for Asami, and for reasons that she could not quite put her finger on. It had started with a shift within herself that seemed to have spread to the world around her. There was a haze around the past that she could not quite place, she could recall the names of books stored in the Furukawa library that simply did not exist and yet felt so real. But it seemed like that was going around a lot these days. Like a veil had been placed over everyone’s eyes, or that veil had been lifted.

But there was else that troubled her, something that she had spent so long trying to suppress. The discordance between her spirit and her soul was bubbling up to the surface. Something was trying to break out, and she did not know what it was nor whether she should fight it or let it happen. This was a feeling like no other, one that kept her awake at night and clawed at the furthest reaches of her psyche like a gnawing darkness.

She had tried communicating by proxy, talking to her weapon and receiving empty responses, and that had yielded nothing of particular use beyond clarifying the obvious. Whatever was going on, only she would be able to find the answer.

It was fortunate that Lady Koizumi was in lighter spirits of late, asking her to cover a few classes at the academy was not a prospect that she enjoyed doing but this was a personal matter. Asami was not one to take leaves of absence unless absolutely necessary anyway, so that at least made the request palatable to her conscience. At least Captain Shuten didn’t seem to mind, though it was hard to find anything much that the Captain really seemed to care about when it concerned work.

So, with her affairs in order, Asami retired to the deepest confines of the Furukawa Estate. These family archives stored many records of the history of the noble families, kept well away from prying eyes. Even her sisters did not know how deep these vaults truly went, and Asami herself was sure that more secrets had been lost with the untimely death of her father. But there she sat, surrounded by history, dressed in her usual attire with her weapons laid out before her.

For a while, she just meditated. Trying to centre herself before entering her inner world, but there was a feeling of doubt that denied her that peace. And so, all other options had exhausted themselves. The sole path forwards was to press onward without a light to guide her.

“Let me in, please.”

Her request was met with silence. Then the droning hum began, quietly at first but quickly rising in volume until it drowned out all other noise. Asami did not resist the call, letting her mind drift away from her body as the transition began.

Be careful not to lose yourself in the reverie, young Lady.

Falling, falling, falling.

She was falling. Tumbling through the sky like a blade of grass taken by the wind. The world span around her, below her and then above, as her bearings were thrown for a loop and it soon became impossible to tell up from down.

Was she even falling or actually climbing upwards? Ascending to new heights?

The spinning continued, unrelenting until she had to close her eyes to stop the sensory overload. Thoroughly lost in the chaos of it all.

And then, as suddenly as it had begun, everything was still. Her eyes opened tentatively, expecting to see the world still spinning around her, but instead, she was where she had wanted to be. Feet firmly upon the ground, gazing up at the sprawling inner world of Musai Kyoutei. With towers that seemed to climb into the clouds themselves, and grounds that stretched for acres in every direction. Her home away from home.

She could remember the first time visiting this place, a scared little girl dabbling with something that she did not quite understand, and could not help but compare herself to that child she had once been. How much had changed, and how little? Perhaps she would find out in time.

Reaching out, her hand pushed open the front door and she stepped inside. The main courtyard was mostly unchanged from her last visit, still as overgrown as ever, as several paths forwards presented themselves in the form of a trio of doors. One on each of the cardinal directions, whilst the exit lay behind her.

“Welcome back, young Lady.”

Musai Kyoutei sat cross-legged in the centre of the courtyard, facing the direction that Asami had entered from. Their masked features seemed to focus on the woman as she strode inside, cocking to one side slightly as if trying to get a read of her intentions when they could already easily sense her displeasure. It was not a sensation that either was particularly used to feeling and yet the spirit did not move from their seated position.

“I trust the estate is still to your liking? Perhaps you would like to walk in the gardens together?”

Those large teal eyes seemed to bore into Asami as they waited for a response, welcoming and concerning in equal measure, though the Shinigami was likely unfazed by their subtle actions.

Asami responded to the questions with a single curt shake of her head, she had not come here to amuse herself and to give in to the temptation of spending a blissful moment with the masked spirit. Her hands rested upon the pommels of her swords, fingers gently tapping a rhythm of her own making against the metal. Moving across the courtyard, she pushed open the next door and was greeted with another courtyard. It was almost identical, other than the absence of her Zanpakuto spirit, but that was enough to have her scanning the darkest recesses for any slight sign of disturbance.

That was comforting, that she was alone again. But she did not feel alone here even when it was only herself in the room. It washed over her like a wave, filling her heart with fear and doubt, and then she was suddenly beginning to put one foot in front of the other at a steadily increasing pace.

Charging through the next door, it was the courtyard again, but Asami continued to sprint forwards. Rooms began to pass by in swift succession as she lost track of the details.

Running. Running. Running. Darkness.

The rooms began to blur together as her speed increased. Asami could be blisteringly fast when she wanted to be, a veteran of the Stealth Division as she was, and so she charged through door after door with desperate tenacity. Was she running from something or running into something? That she could not quite decide. There was something that she wanted to find, and yet she also could not hide the feeling in her gut that she did not want to be found by it.

If there was nothing here, she was crazy. If there was something here, she was still crazy. Whatever was going on inside her Zanpakuto, as per her discussion with Murasaki, was distinctly unnatural.

After a few dozen rooms, she was no longer in a courtyard but rather in the lobby of the estate. A room defined by grandiose stairs and great windows, and yet this grace appeared forgotten by the passage of time. Dust had already gathered upon the wood and the glass, whilst the shadows seemed to spread farther than they should. That was enough to bring her to a halt, to finally look into the depths of herself, and yet there was still nothing here. Nothing but herself.

The woman sighed, but she still could not decide if it was resignation or frustration. She had come here looking for monsters, and yet all she had found was herself.

Was this a point of self-realization? The grand reveal that she was the nightmare that had been haunting her? That felt empty.

Hollow even.

“How long will you continue to deceive yourself, young Lady?”

Musai Kyoutei stood behind her, had they followed or had they always been waiting here? Asami did not know how exactly the spirit travelled in this realm. She barely knew how she travelled from room to room herself beyond simply putting one foot in front of the other. Was that what she had been missing? That this twisted world was only taking her to where she wanted to go?

"Incorrect. This place is not something so trivial as to bend to your will."

Of course, they could read her like a book even when she was so naturally guarded. What, then, was the meaning of their response? That she was not in control?

"When were you under the illusion that you were?"

Asami's hands instinctively went to her weapons, spinning on her heels as the steel cleared its sheathes, but suddenly there was no one there to strike at. Had Musai Kyoutei ever been there at all? But then who was she talking to?

She took a step forwards, to inspect the spot where she had sensed the presence but was met instead with the sound of cracking wood. The ground beneath her, seeming to warp and age at a rapid rate, gave way under her weight. Tumbling backwards, limbs flailing, as her natural reaction to grab onto something to prevent her from falling caused her weapons to tumble first into the void whilst she felt the other floorboards crumbling to her touch. Desperately she squirmed, pushing herself upwards for but a few moments more, before finally calling out as the nothingness consumed her.

"Where are you?!"

Falling, falling, falling.



Again.



Had she ever even landed or had that entirely confusing visit been a figment of her imagination? This was her own fault. For diving in headfirst without properly considering the consequences so what came next? Was this a challenge for her to overcome? Or a trial of her crimes?

No. This was self-doubt made manifest. For a woman so sure of herself and her motivation, it was decimating to Asami. If she was not order then was she chaos? If she was chaos then where was order?

"You're starting to believe it now. You've always known I was down here somewhere."

The voice was familiar, the inflexion different. Was it taunting her? Mocking that feeling of helplessness? That stirred her guts into a quiet flame, the embers finally alighting into something of an innocent rage. If her spirit wanted to provoke her into action then she supposed it was going about it correctly.

The ground finally appeared to be growing closer as she plummeted through the darkness. But it was not the same dreary estate that was waiting to receive her, this version of her inner world felt different. She did not know how she knew, and yet she did. It was like she was looking at it through a broken mirror.