New Beginnings: The Road To Recovery [Arianda/Fuurinji]

As Arianda spoke, Fuu wiped the tears from her face. Taking a few moments to compose herself fully as she sat back up, nodding to the first words she said about simply putting it out of her mind for now. The gentle kiss and masterful hand movements aiding greatly in her mind being distracted away from the painful past that was her former life, letting Fuu lean into the hand. Arianda made it fully clear that training was quite simply out of the question right now, citings Fuu's recent mental instability as the reason it wouldn't happen.

This wasn't exactly something Fuu liked to hear, training was her first and foremost way of clearing her mind and keeping it focused on something else. However, Arianda did bring up a good idea of giving a tour of the new abode while doubling down on adopting Fuu into her home and letting her stay there indefinitely rather than temporarily. "Well if I'm not going to be allowed to train, then I suppose a tour is the next best thing for a distraction..." Not that she'd be able to see much of the detail from the tour, but then again such things would likely distract her from the function of the house and that which resided within.

She couldn't say with full confidence that she was wrong, even Fuu knew that training when not in a good mind state only meant that training would be far less fruitful. So finishing the exploration that she'd begun when she first awoke was probably the next best thing, though meditation was something she'd need to do sooner rather than later since that was rather pivitol to how she fought in general.

Alas that would have to wait, and she couldn't say that her curiosity was satiated from before anyway. So she nodded and joined Arianda, not needing any help to stand or walk thankfully. Most of the house was what one might expect from a traditional residence, though admittedly the last time she'd been in a 'house' properly was quite awhile ago and the shack she grew up in was nothing close to resembling a 'proper' house. The one thing she was thankful for was that even if doors were locked or rooms left intentionally unexplained, cracks existed everywhere and her unique form of vision let her see even that which would normally be impossible to see without x-ray vision as a result. There were few places within the house she couldn't see into thanks to her Wind Reading, a vacuum of space was neigh impossible to achieve.

Given the brief stop that she had in front of only one room, a room that was locked at that, Fuu took it to heart that it was likely special to Arianda and to pry would be akin to an invasion of privacy, and so despite being able to see into the room, Fuu made no mention of the room nor its any contents of the room that might be within. Instead they were swiftly redirected to the room that she'd started in originally, a rather barren room that was meant to be filled with things that the Shinigami decided to fill it with if anything.

She had to admit, she had very few possessions before going solo, and now that she was solo the only things she had on her were sparse few rations, her clothes and, her twin Zanpakuto's. However, there was one thing that she could 'decorate' the room with. Before they left, Fuurinji pulled both of her Zanpakuto's from their sheath, moving over to the wall that was connected to the door and carved a single symbol onto it, 風.

To some the symbol itself might not seem that important, but those that knew what the symbol itself was and knew Fuurinji they'd realize the significance of it. The symbol was the same one for the word 'Wind'. For Fuurinji, the wind was everything beyond simply being the theme of her Zanpakuto, though she didn't explain the reason for carving it into the wall.

They didn't remain in the room much longer, and returning to Arianda's room though she didn't have much within that Fuu hadn't already taken note of. As a result her exploration was far slower and more methodical, her hands tracing around some objects to look for any defects or hidden crannies that tried to hide themselves from her gaze. Truth be told there was little that she hadn't already found with her gaze, opening drawers and the like weren't even needed for much of what was within the rooms, the natural cracks and crevices that existed within objects allowed for any amount of wind through and as a result allowed her gaze to pierce it.

So much of her time within the room was spent standing still, only her head turning slightly though even that was more done on instinct towards whatever it was she was focusing on. For anyone else such sight that she had would make it very difficult to focus on any one thing, as it essentially gave her 360 degree vision with its only limitation being the lack of any real detail. "You've got... a very large room... and an even larger closet."

Wanting a large area for a large amount of clothes wasn't that unusual, if Fuu had that kind of luxury before she'd of probably done the same truth be told, though didn't protest as she was soon guided out of the room and back downstairs. Once in the living room, Fuu took a seat near Ari before she began to lay down some basic guidelines, or as she called them rules, for living with her. This wasn't too surprising either as any household had a set of rules that one must abide by whilst there, whether living there or not.

Of course she needed no reminder about what had transpired before, and truth be told such events she preferred to try and not think about as much as was possible. While her first rule wasn't exactly surprising either, when Fuu went to protest against it she was simultaneously ignored and cut off by Ari. Even as she tried to clarify why she felt like she did, her words were overshadowed by the other as they simply continued to speak over her. It didn't take long before she simply stopped trying to protest and instead resigned herself to listening instead despite how much she wished to do otherwise... but perhaps that was the point.

It wasn't that the other was trying to stop her from doing that which she had always done, but rather to only do certain parts of it under... extremely specific circumstances. Admittedly most of these were already in line with how she had acted, but it was being made to be only under these circumstances and that was perhaps why Fuu wanted to protest so badly. She'd gone so very long on her own that she'd grown accustomed to simply doing things her way, not having to listen to the authority of another. However the clarity in which everything was stated made certain things were not in any uncertain terms.

Especially towards the end and the walk of redemption that Fuu was now on, but even then it was still technically in line with what she'd already begun doing, yet with the not-uncertain-terms that she'd been treated too beforehand. While she didn't agree with everything, she knew she needed to follow them. Even if nothing else was true, Arianda certainly had the capability of killing her rather easily and, at least until she could stand a chance in a fight, she had no real choice but to accept these terms and conditions. "I... understand, even if I don't agree with the methodology."

Fuu wanted to be sure that she at least stated something in her own defense, though she didn't argue any further against the rules nor did she show any sign of desiring to do such. Sure she wanted to protest against them, but she knew that such protests were coming from her past and not her present and so to do such would only be to lean into that past reflection... which was something she wanted to get away from.

For Fuurinji, there was a singular thing that mattered the absolute most to her, Balance. Even looking outside of her duties as a Shinigami and keeping the balance of souls, her entire fighting style revolved around balance. Balance of Good and Evil, Balance of the Elements, Balance of the Mind and Soul, Balance of Desire and Want. Without balance, nothing could flourish and thrive, and if nothing flourished... if nothing thrived, then nothing could live.

It was strange to think that in her entire time serving in the Gotei, that which she looked to first and foremost was well and truly beyond her grasp this entire time in spite of thinking and feeling like it was the opposite. However she wasn't one to question the reality that was before her, though when ones mind is clouded it can be difficult to discern reality from fiction. The question now was, was she seeing true reality, or was she merely seeing fictitious reality?

She could not help but let those words sink in, her thoughts swarming like bees in a hive set ablaze, to protect that which she cherished meant she needed something to cherish. To cherish something meant she needed a clear mind, and to have a clear mind meant she had time. She barely noticed the change in her position, and though she allowed the petting to commence and continue it wasn't a conscious effort.

"Going back to Soul Society is beyond my capabilities right now. To do so would be to face that which I am not physically or emotionally ready for." She said plainly, resting her head against Arianda's chest "No before I do that, I must find the balance within myself for without that how can I maintain the balance of the world?" She was mostly musing to herself in all honesty, but she knew what she had to do... she just... had to do it.

For the most part Fuurinji understood what she needed to do, before she could even speak about redemption she needed to find the balance within herself. "It wasn't really racism... My hatred was grounded in facts about what they've done as a whole in the past... But that hatred stemmed from the past, from an admiration for something that'd long been gone and even after knowing there are those within that feel differently, my attitude towards the whole didn't change. It was a long held grudge for those that no longer lived, and I placed the blame for that grudge on those that were alive yet had nothing to do with it." Truthfully speaking she didn't hate the Quincy's solely for them being Quincy, but there was a narrow line she walked with her hatred that could've easily bled over into such a thought process.

"Either way, whether it be an unwarranted grudge versus true racism, it was something that was once justified and no longer was... but I refused to accept that or believe it was possible for them to change. I merely assumed that all Quincy would hold the same belief, because all the ones I knew did." She shook her head slightly, relaxing herself enough to close her eyes. "But I do think there are a lot of things I must reflect on before I can move on, which in itself will take a long time. Words said long ago that I remembered yet chose to forgo the true meaning of, and intentions long held that need to be held in earnest."