Solhammond Palliser | THE MOON CUTTER
He listened to her speak, after all it was the least he owed her. Even if a part of him wished to simply leave, as she spoke his arms crossed on his chest. Perhaps not the best sign for communication, but there was definitely some tension to this entire situation. But he listened to everything she had to say, without saying a single word in response. Not once did he cut her off, only nodding when she spoke about wanting a conversation. It took perhaps a great measure of his will power to betray how deeply this effected him, the bubbling of emotion in his stomach.
Finally, after she had said everything he was merely silent. His arms remained crossed before a discomforted sigh left his lips, eyes closing as his arms dropped. A deep breath was taken as he tried to steady himself, his nerves. It was clear that a lot was moving through his head, before finally he responded in kind. His voice steady, his eyes opening slowly. There was a change in Sol from when they had their last meaningful conversation.
A darkness remained in him, within his soul. That remained. That deep seeded chaos which seemed to at times dominate him. There was a good man inside of him, but it was wrestling with a demon. And more often than not, that demon won.
"I learned a lot, when I was gone. I gained a lot, when I stayed with the Suika." His smooth tenor seemed carefully maintained, his hands lifted themselves up to reveal the tattoos that adorned his body. "These are more than aesthetic. Personal meanings to myself. A dragon across my arms, Yin-Yang upon my fist... and roses across my chest." He'd slowly stop speaking as if trying to pick what to say next.
"I know you slept with someone, or someones, else when we separated. When I found out, I was angry. Because I didn't. I chose not to, because I thought- I thought- we where going to come together again. After we changed. After we got better." He'd shake his head bringing a hand to his head, running his fingers through the long black hair. He'd inhale deeply, sighing with a mix of frustration and annoyance. "I guess I was being naïve." He'd wave his hand dismissively.
A pause, his head turning to look towards the second of the house where their kids remained.
"I don't think there's anything you can do for me, except try to be a good mother to our kids. Because, as much, as I want to just- leave- I won't ever leave them. I'm preparing to leave your estate, I think it's time I establish something for our kids beyond.. this.. fucked up family." He'd remark, almost bitterly, clearly losing control of the carefully neutral state of mind. Instead the white hot coals of anger seemed to be taking hold. His eyes closing tightly, his back turning to her. A sharp sniff through the nose.
"I'm glad you're trying to be a better person. Really. I am. But I just don't know, if I can handle anymore heartache. Maybe this is selfish of me, and maybe a better man could let things go. But I can't. Not now." His head hung low for a second, a heart beat of silence passing.
"I am trying, so very hard, to be more than this, Chidori. I have to, become better than this. For our kids. For.." He stopped, painfully. His head rising up as his shoulders squared themselves.
END POST | THE DEAD