We got the moves [Hime/Hanako]

The Big Woman

Hanako Yamada

Hanako thought about it for a few more moments, then she said:
"Then maybe…I'll try it on?"

The shop assistant seemed pleased and took the dress away to prep it and a changing room for her. Somehow Hana felt excited about it, when she followed the assistant inside.
It felt weird inside the small changing room. It was something very unusual for Hanako. When she undressed, she looked into the narrow, but tall mirror on the wall. It was almost tall enough that she could see herself entirely in it. She took a quick look at her rather boring underwear, her defined muscles on arms, shoulders and on her flat belly.
After a few moments she had slipped on the dress. It was beautiful and the fabric was so soft and light that it barely felt like anything at all, compared to her shihakusho. The only thing was that it was a little bit too tight around the ches for Hana's comfort. Thanks to her muscles her girth was more than with other women her height. There were also her breasts that came literally on top of these muscles, which also had to fit into the dress somehow.

She was very self-conscious when she stepped out of the changing room to present herself to Hime and the shop assistant.

"What…what do you think? I like it…"

She looked down on herself. It was so different from what she usually saw. So soft. So feminine. She loved it.

"But it is a bit tight. I don't think I can…"

At this point the shop assistant chimed in for the first time.

"Oooooh, nononono, that is not a problem. We can change it, make it fit, and send it to you."

Still unsure, Hanako looked to Hime. It was clearly visible in her eyes that she really liked the dress and felt good wearing it, but was in need of help and a supportive word.

*** ***

A short while later the two women were outside again, Hanako back in her usual attire. The noise and bustle of the street welcomed them back.
To the big she-warrior, the day felt special. Because she didn't feel just like a warrior anymore. She felt like a person, like an individual. She had been so used to the cold and hollow feeling inside of her, the void where a life should have been. Even though she had partially accepted it and tried to move forward, it had always been there. But when Hanako had tried on that dress….something had changed. It was as if something was was there, something that made her more than an empty, fortified shell and a new history. She felt like…someone normal.

She just wanted to say something along those lines, when another thing caught her eye. But not only her eye this time. An expression of utter confusion dominated her face. As if in a trance she started walking away from Hime, without any word, and across the street. Like a sleepwalker she dodged the people that were walking in every direction and headed on towards her goal. It was as if it drew her in. It was a music store that displayed many different instruments.

The Big Woman

Hanako Yamada

It took some effort from Hanako to register Hime's question.

"Yeah…no…I don't know." she said, audibly struggling to concentrate on the words. She also seemed to be really unsure about what she was doing.

Despite this she walked into the store with a purpose and straight to a little instrument that had been visible from the street. It hung on a wall and consisted of a small wooden body with resonating skins on front and back. From this body a sleek wooden neck extended upwards and between the head of the neck and the body two strings were taut. There was also a bow. Without hesitation, but with great care, Hanako took the instrument from the wall. For a moment she held it in her hands and looked down at it, a dreamy smile on her face. Then she sat down on the floor, the instrument in her lap, and gripled the bow.

"Oh, an erhu. A very beautiful, very delicate instrument." said there an old man. The way he carried himself he seemed to be the owner of the shop.
"Do you know how to play, young lady? It is really a very delicate…hey, do you even listen?"

Hanako didn't say anything, merel, grunted something unintelligible at the old man. Her face mirrored a storm of emotions that went on inside her, confusion among the strongest. But she needed to see this through. This meant something.
She didn't look up and with a soft movement of the bow she played one note…

It came out crystal clear and perfect. Hanako seemed to know what she did, but the confusion on her face seemed to become deeper.

Then she began to play. It was a slow, soft song. It was a bittersweet tune, a promise of happiness and a bright future, but it rode on a wave of sadness and despair. It wafted through the shop and out the door, embracing everyone in reach. But it was short and ended soon.

"That was…I guess I was wrong about you, young lady." The owner said.
"You are a seasoned player, obviously."

Hanako looked up, first at the owner, then at Hime. She held Hime's gaze, her own reflecting probably as much surprise as the shop owners.

"I…ah ..I never played before in my life. I have no…I don't know how I did this."

The Big Woman

Hanako Yamada

Hime and the shop owner both didn't say a single word after Hanako had stopped playing. It was a s if she was just waking up from a dream and discovering she was sleepwalking and had done something incredibly embarrassing. Hana definitely felt embarrassed. She felt her cheeks become warmer and knew that her face was lighting up in a bright red, announcing her feelings to everyone around her.

Slowly she stood up and gave the instrument back to the shop owner. She handled the piece very carefully, but the safety of a trained hand from earlier didn't fully disappear.

"Ahm…excuse me." She said to the owner. "I am sorry for…barging in here like this. Could I…I would like to buy this instrument. Please send it and the bill to the Seireitei, Office of the Fourth Division's Lieutenant."

The owner still showed a bewildered expression on his face, but did as he was asked, took the erhu and disappeared into the back of the shop.

Meanwhile Hanako turned to Hime again. Several times she opened her mouth and closed it again, uncertain what to say.

"I'm…ah…really sorry for that. I think." She said.
"I honestly have no idea where that came from. It was so…so familiar."

Hana exhaled slowly and closed her eyes for a moment. Unconsciously she bit her lower lip, a habit she had dropped a while ago.

"Can we…can we go? Please?"

As soon as they had left the shop and were in open air again Hanako took a deep breath and sighed. Several people were still standing around, watching the music store.

"Sorry…I just needed to get out there. It was like the walls were closing in on me all of a sudden."

Hanako began walking slowly down the street. It was more a saunter than a walk and clearly meant to bring a little distance between them and the shop.

"I apologize again for acting so…"

Hanako was obviously upset, but she didn't actually know what about. It was somewhat similar to her experience in Hueco Mundo, albeit much less unpleasant. But it touched her in the same way, only another part of her.

Hanako was just about to say something else when she heard someone call out to her. Or at least she thought so. She stopped.

"Ameko!"

Again. A female voice. Hanako turned around and looked for the origin of the voice. Her heart began to beat faster. Who in all worlds would know her real name? It was impossible!

A tall, slender woman was standing there and stared at Hime and Hanako. No, she was only staring at Hanako. She had dark brown eyes and long, satin black hair, and wore a plain blue colored every-day kimono. Her face was elf like and of exceptional beauty. As soon as Hanako had turned around the woman's eyes began to fill with tears.

Hanako gave Hime a side-glance, looking for help.

"Ameko…my Ameko…it's really you…"

Suddenly there was a flurry of blue fabric and dark hair and from one moment to the next Hanako wasn't standing next to Hime anymore. Instead she was laying on the ground, the woman on top of her. She had darted off and flung herself an Hanako, now hugging her tightly while burrying her face on Hana's neck, while sobbing and laughing simultaneously. Hanako, meanwhile, was even more confused than before.

"Ah..Hi…Hime…a little help here?"

The Big Woman

Hanako Yamada

With Hime’s help Hanako could free herself enough to sit up. This situation was becoming more and more uncomfortable. Hime, meanwhile, was asking the right question as Hana herself drew a total blank at this moment.

“I…I would like to know as well.”

She stood up slowly and pulled the strange woman up with her. She was not much shorter than Hanako, although a lot smaller in overall mass. Hana looked deep into the other’s eyes.

“How do you know that name? Hardly anyone knows that name and certainly no one outside Seireitei.”

Her voice wasn’t unfriendly, but it was firm. There was suspicion in her eyes. This woman had called her by her name. But it hadn’t been Hanako, the name she went by for the last decade. She had called her Ameko. A name almost no one else knew. She remembered a burnt down village, overgrown with vegetation, barely anything left at all. No life, nothing. There was something else. Something lingering just outside her reach. A blurred picture of…

…and it was gone.

“What do you mean, how do I know that name?” the woman said, her voice showing signs of hurt.

She looked to and fro between Hanako and Hime.

“A…and I really…really hope to be someone…special…”

She was barely keeping it together, desperation gripping her as a sudden realisation came to her. She focused on Hanako and with one hand gently touched her face.

“Ameko…my Ame.” Her voice nearly broke when she spoke the name. “Why can’t you remember me? It’s me, Kumomi, your…”

At the same moment Kumomi said her name, Hanako's eyes went wide and she became white as a sheet. For a second she couldn’t breathe anymore. There was a scene before her inner eye. It was the house in her inner world, the living room and a small picture frame. There was a picture frame standing on a small side table. She had seen it before. It was one of many, many picture frames that hung and stood around the house. Most of them were empty. Some of them were filled with memories from the past decade, since Hanako woke up in the hospital, one arm and all her marbles short. Her first tryouts for the Gotei, the First Division, the Fourth, Tento, Kobayashi, Hime. There were also some filled with pictures of other memories. Older memories. A village in the forest, a younger Hanako…there were awfully few of them. One of those frames had a blurry image on it. An image of two individuals, probably women or girls. Probably because it couldn’t be made out. But no more. The image was no longer blurry. It indeed showed two young women. One was Hanako. She was a bit younger and an almost scrawny thing. Her hair wasn’t dyed dark-red yet and she actually knew how to smile properly, but she was at least already the tall women she was now. The other one was the woman from the street, also a bit younger, but the same slender figure and beautiful face. They were standing arm in arm, grinning out of the picture. Hanako remembered who the woman was. It was Kumomi, her…

“...sister!”

The exclamation would cause a pause in anyone listening in on the conversation, because it hadn’t been Kumomi who had finished her sentence, but Hanako. Suddenly her eyes were filled with tears, too, and she grabbed Kumomi, pulled her close and hugged her so tight it looked for a second she might snap her in half. But before that could happen Hanako loosened her grip, but still held the other one close. When she turned towards Hime, tears were still streaming over her cheeks and there were more emotions in her expression in a single moment than in the whole last year combined. Yet all that aside she was smiling, almost grinning. Not the crooked half-smile she usually wore, but a full on smile that came from the heart.

“Ah…I’m sorry Hime. Again. Ah…let me…there are some introductions in order. Eh…Kumi, this is Hime, a dear friend of mine. Hime, this is Kumomi…my big sister.”

The Big Woman

Hanako Yamada

Meanwhile Hanako and Kumomi were giggling and grinning, while tears still ran down their cheeks. It was visible, at least to Hime, that Hanako's demeanour was somewhat different. Where she always seemed inhibited before, best visible with a smile that never became full, she was now like a different person. She smiled and it was like when she and Hime had danced, only brighter, warmer.

Then Hime came in and embraced Kumi and Hana at the same time and it was so beautiful that the two sisters started laugh-crying again.

All in all it took a few minutes until they were calm enough again so they could talk properly.

With a smile that was so cordial and warm that it could have melted a glacier Kumomi looked at Hime and placed one of her slender hands on her arm.

"Thank you, Hime."

Now that she had calmed down her voice had a very pleasant, melodic sound.

"If I had known that my Ame-chan has such friends I could have been sure that she was safe."

She looked at Hana and in her eyes was an almost untamable pride and love like only a big sister, who had been worried about her sibling before, could have. No matter the time that had gone by since they last seen each other, Kumomi had always been a big sister and those instincts were indestructible. When Hime praised Hanako she looked at her with that pride in her eyes and some details only now registered with her.

"Shinigami? And your division? I see that I have to catch up a lot." Kumi said smiling.

"Not as much as I have to." Was Hanako's cryptic answer. Hana looked at Hime.

"Maybe we should go somewhere, sit down, talk…" she said, and to Kumi she added:
"It is all very…uh, confusing to me right now. I need some time to adjust…"

Concern suddenly mixed into Kumi's expression.

"Do you want me to leave you al…"

"No!" Hanako interrupted quickly and with force.
"Nononononono! I will never ever let you go again. There may be some gaps but I know that I never want to be apart from you again."

"Gaps? What do you mean with gaps?"

Hanako hesitated. She pulled a face as if she had a headache coming on.

"This…is hard to explain…and why we need to talk. Until now…when I met you…I remembered only the last ten or so years. Everything before…completely gone. Only recently did some bits and pieces come back. Now there is more coming back…but it's coming randomly, incoherent shreds…hard to make sense of."

"Oh, my poor Ame…"

There were a few moments of silence before Kumomi spoke to Hime.

"Do you know something where we could sit and talk? Maybe some place where we could drink a tea?"

Hanako nodded to that.

"Yes…I'd love a tea."

"You like tea?" Kumi commented with surprise. "That's new."
And to Hime again she said: "And I would really like for you to stay with us. I think Ameko feels comfortable in your presence."